1.6 - Impossible Revelation
Author's note: Sorry this was delayed for so long, and then the fact that I missed the deadline of Friday! It's now Sunday, and yes, I know I'm not good at this! :)----- We return to Coronation Street as Steve takes in the sight before him.
'Karen...'
'Steve,' says Karen, and her heart is melting already, though she knows she can't show it.
'What are you doin' here?'
'I came back for you, Steve... our baby.'
Steve's eyes widen. 'Our what?'
'Our baby... I left him with you last night.'
'That was... you did that...?'
'I didn't know what to do, Steve, I was scared to see you but I wanted you to spend time with Oscar...'
'Oscar?' Steve says distantly. 'I have to go...'
'Where?'
'TO WORK!'
'Where's Oscar?'
'I called the police, Karen, you flippin idiot. What was I supposed to think when I found a baby on my doorstep in a storm?'
'He's my baby,' Karen calls. 'He's our baby! Where is he, in there? With your new girlfriend?'
'Yes, Karen.'
At that moment, a police car pulls up in the street, and out step two men. Steve doubles back on himself. 'Officer...'
'Officer,' repeats Karen, stepping forward. 'There's been a mistake.'
Tracy, who has been watching the debacle, scowls and storms away.
'Are you Mr McDonald?' one officer asks Steve.
'Yes,' says Steve.
'He has my baby in his flat...'
'Is this true?'
'That's why I called!' Steve replies, exasperated.
'Do you know this woman?' the other officer asks of Steve.
'It's my wi- my ex wife.'
'I think we need to go inside,' the officer says.
Over at the Grimshaw's, Todd and Eileen are sitting down on the sofa. 'I just don't want to see him, mum,' says Todd.
'You obviously saw him again after you left, son, why are you blanking him now?'
'It's complicated...'
'Nothing's too complicated for your Mum.'
'You wouldn't understand.'
'Todd!' Eileen cries. 'I can't believe you just said that to me... your own mother, the one who you spent so long talking to before you went...'
'I'm sorry, Mum! Things have got difficult for me... all I do is hurt people, and I don't want to hurt Karl any more than I already have...'
Eileen pretends she didn't overhear her son's conversation with Sean the previous night.
'You can't hide from him forever, he said he'll call back soon on the phone. You could at least talk to him!'
'I'll think about it,' says Todd. 'I'm going out.'
He stands, and exits, leaving Eileen looking concerned in the lounge.
Over at the Rovers, Violet is in the snug, applying lipstick.
'Who is this lad then?' asks Shelley.
'Oh, no one,' says Violet. 'Just someone I met yesterday. He seems nice. We're just going out for a bit today. I gave him my number.'
'Where are you going to go?'
'Not sure, he said he's taking me out on the bus somewhere.'
'Are you sure you can trust him?'
'I know I can,' says Violet, turning around from the mirror. 'He's a good guy, Shell.'
Steve leads the way as he ascends the stairs angrily, and he, the two officers, and Karen enter his flat. Upstairs, Ronnie is in the kitchen when the door opens. 'What did you forget?' she says with a laugh, but when she sees Steve accompanied by three others, she soon shuts up.
'Is this about the baby?'
'Yes...' Steve says, and Karen emerges.
'You must be Steve's new girlfriend,' says Karen, shaking her hand.
'That's right,' says Ronnie, smiling, though she can't hide her ambiguity. 'Who're you?'
'Karen Phillips.'
'Ah right, so you're a frien-'
'I'm his ex wife.'
This silences Ronnie. She looks over at Steve, who looks despondent, before announcing she is going to go out. She grabs her coat and is gone within a minute.
'Right, then,' says one of the officers.
'Make yourself at home,' says Steve with a hint of sarcasm, and the officers do so. Karen does not sit.
'Where's Oscar?' she repeats.
'Hang on,' says Steve. 'You're lucky I've got baby stuff here 'cause of Amy, Karen!' he snaps, and heads into the bedroom. Moments later, he's back out holding the child. 'Here.'
Karen takes the baby and sits down. 'Come on Steve, make yourself at home,' she says.
Steve sits.
Over at the Peacock house, Claire is in the kitchen while Ashley sits with the baby. 'Ashley?' Claire starts.
'Yeah?'
'Are you still mad with me, about Matt?'
'I'm mad with him, Claire, not you... if he so much as tries to come near us ever again, I'll kill him...'
'He still wants to be a part of Josh's life...'
'If it wasn't for him, you wouldn't have been put at risk! He knocked you down Claire, that's why your waters broke! I wanted to be here when the baby was born - she was due in two weeks!'
'Well you weren't here were you?' Claire cries.
'No, I was with Maxine's mum... she wants to see her grandson every now and then, you know!'
'You've been ignoring me for weeks though,' Claire says. 'Ever since Matt came on the scene, things have been different...'
Ashley can understand what she's saying. 'I know... but -'
'No, Ashley, I want things to be how they were... we've got a new baby now, if you don't love me you can tell me now!'
'Of course I love you,' says Ashley, feeling tearful. 'Come here...'
Claire sits by his side and he puts his arm around her. 'Things are going to be okay. I'll deal with Matt, and I won't let him spoil our marriage again. It's going to be fine, Claire, it's all going to be fine...'
Claire is reassured by his words, but Ashley's expression is of determination. He means what he says - if Matt tries anything again, he doesn't know what he'll do, but he knows he might not be responsible for his actions...
At the Baldwin house, Jamie is waking. He opens his eyes and spots Danny sitting in the chair, looking despondent, grief-stricken. He can't find the words to say. Frankie returns to the room. Dan, they can fit in a funeral tomorrow, or is it too soon?'
Danny looks up and nods. 'No, tomorrow... it needs to be done...'
'And the will...' adds Frankie. 'His will is to be read on Tuesday... they need direct family present.'
'Okay, yeah,' says Danny, and on remembering how he conned his father while he was so easily manipulated brings a tear to his eye. Jamie stands up rather quickly. He can't forgive Danny for what he did to Mike, sending him to Spain, using him for the cash...
'Jamie,' Frankie breathes. 'I'll make you some breakfast...'
'I'm going to the cafe.'
He's gone before another word can be said.
'About this funeral,' Danny croaks. 'What do we need to do?'
'Don't worry, Dan, I'll fix it - I'm making calls... Mike's being transferred to the morgue today, I think you should go and see him. It's what's best.'
'Yes,' Danny breathes. 'I'll go now...' Then he remembers the others. 'What about Penny? Adam? The factory...?'
'Leave it to me Dan, just focus on yourself.'
The gratitude in Danny's eyes doesn't go unnoticed by Frankie, who smiles and starts dialling another number.
Todd is at the bus stop when Violet meets him. 'Hey,' she says.
'Hey,' he says, smiling.
'Where are you taking me?'
'You'll have to wait and see,' Todd replies enigmatically. 'You got any other plans for today?'
'No, I got a day off,' says Violet, before returning to the topic. 'Shouldn't I be wary about letting a mysterious man take me out for the day to an unknown place?'
She's smiling. So is he.
'Yes,' says Todd. 'You should be terrified. I'm out to get you!'
He laughs, and their bus arrives. The step onto the bus and pay, but they are being watched. For, standing in the entrance to the health centre, is Gail Platt.
'So this baby,' says one of the officers, 'is your baby?'
'Yes,' say Steve and Karen in unison.
'Then why did you call?'
'Um...'
'Wasting police time is a criminal offence, Mr McDonald.'
The officers are now standing. 'In future, please only call if your need is important - there are other people who need police help, people who aren't wasting valuable time.'
'We're very sorry,' says Karen, though her sincerity is debatable.
'Well, we'll say no more,' says the officer. 'We'll let ourselves out.'
Once the officers are gone, Karen stops Steve from leaving with them. 'We need to talk.'
Over at the Peacock house, all is well. 'I'm going to go to Fresco's and buy some things for the baby... we need to think of names... nappies... oh, my!' says Claire, climbing up.
Ashley's laughing. 'Names? I hadn't even thought...'
'Well have a think, I'll be back soon...'
Claire grabs her coat as Ashley offers to come with her. 'No, stay here with the baby, have some quality time with her.'
She smiles, and leaves, opening the door to reveal Matt Ramsden, who was just about to knock. Gasping, she pushes him out and slams the door before Ashley can see. 'Matt, you can't ever come back here!'
She's walking and Matt's walking backwards. 'Whoa, whoa, why?'
'Ashley - you really made him mad, he says he'll kill you if you come back again... he's so mad that you delivered our baby, he never wants to see you again... Please, stay away!'
'I can't abandon Josh, he's my son!'
'Stay away, Matt, go home, get away! I'm sorry... for your own sakes, stop. Ashley and I need to think about our baby, we can't be doing with stress...'
'But Josh is my kid.'
'He's not your kid, he never was! We raised him! Stay away! Get in your car and go home...'
Claire storms past him, hoping he'll get into his car, which he does. She breathes a relieved sigh and continues to Fresco's. Matt drives to the end of the Street and stops for a moment, looking back at the Peacock house. He wasn't going to give up on his son, no matter what Claire said. Regardless of Ashley's empty threats.
Inside, Gail is returning to her house to find Sarah. She can't believe Todd has the nerve to come back - after all this time... opening her door with her key, she calls up to her daughter.
Sarah and Jason are dressing upstairs. 'Yeah?' Sarah calls.
'Come down here, I've got something to tell you.'
'Jason!' Sarah says urgently. 'My mum can't know you're here... she's supposed to have gone to work!'
'I'll wait on the stairs,' says Jason.
'Sarah!' Gail calls again.
'Coming,' Sarah shouts back, and she's running down the stairs. 'What is it?'
'Want to know who I just saw on the Street?'
'Who?' says Sarah, though she already knows.
'Todd.'
'I know...'
'You know?'
'Last night, I called for Jason and he was there...'
'Well are you okay?'
'Yeah, I'm fine, it's just a shock... I want him to stay away from me. He's probably not stopping...'
'Let's hope not,' says Gail fretfully. 'I couldn't believe it when I saw him canoodling with Violet from the Rovers... I thought he was supposed to be gay?'
'Violet?' Sarah cries. 'He was with Violet?'
'Yes, and it looks like they are very much in to eachother. That boy is troubled, I'll tell you ... after everything he's put you through...!'
'Yeah,' says Sarah distantly, and she's so surprised she can barely speak.
And on the stairs, equally as surprised, but shocked and angry and upset moreso, Jason can't believe his ears.
'Karen...'
'Steve,' says Karen, and her heart is melting already, though she knows she can't show it.
'What are you doin' here?'
'I came back for you, Steve... our baby.'
Steve's eyes widen. 'Our what?'
'Our baby... I left him with you last night.'
'That was... you did that...?'
'I didn't know what to do, Steve, I was scared to see you but I wanted you to spend time with Oscar...'
'Oscar?' Steve says distantly. 'I have to go...'
'Where?'
'TO WORK!'
'Where's Oscar?'
'I called the police, Karen, you flippin idiot. What was I supposed to think when I found a baby on my doorstep in a storm?'
'He's my baby,' Karen calls. 'He's our baby! Where is he, in there? With your new girlfriend?'
'Yes, Karen.'
At that moment, a police car pulls up in the street, and out step two men. Steve doubles back on himself. 'Officer...'
'Officer,' repeats Karen, stepping forward. 'There's been a mistake.'
Tracy, who has been watching the debacle, scowls and storms away.
'Are you Mr McDonald?' one officer asks Steve.
'Yes,' says Steve.
'He has my baby in his flat...'
'Is this true?'
'That's why I called!' Steve replies, exasperated.
'Do you know this woman?' the other officer asks of Steve.
'It's my wi- my ex wife.'
'I think we need to go inside,' the officer says.
Over at the Grimshaw's, Todd and Eileen are sitting down on the sofa. 'I just don't want to see him, mum,' says Todd.
'You obviously saw him again after you left, son, why are you blanking him now?'
'It's complicated...'
'Nothing's too complicated for your Mum.'
'You wouldn't understand.'
'Todd!' Eileen cries. 'I can't believe you just said that to me... your own mother, the one who you spent so long talking to before you went...'
'I'm sorry, Mum! Things have got difficult for me... all I do is hurt people, and I don't want to hurt Karl any more than I already have...'
Eileen pretends she didn't overhear her son's conversation with Sean the previous night.
'You can't hide from him forever, he said he'll call back soon on the phone. You could at least talk to him!'
'I'll think about it,' says Todd. 'I'm going out.'
He stands, and exits, leaving Eileen looking concerned in the lounge.
Over at the Rovers, Violet is in the snug, applying lipstick.
'Who is this lad then?' asks Shelley.
'Oh, no one,' says Violet. 'Just someone I met yesterday. He seems nice. We're just going out for a bit today. I gave him my number.'
'Where are you going to go?'
'Not sure, he said he's taking me out on the bus somewhere.'
'Are you sure you can trust him?'
'I know I can,' says Violet, turning around from the mirror. 'He's a good guy, Shell.'
Steve leads the way as he ascends the stairs angrily, and he, the two officers, and Karen enter his flat. Upstairs, Ronnie is in the kitchen when the door opens. 'What did you forget?' she says with a laugh, but when she sees Steve accompanied by three others, she soon shuts up.
'Is this about the baby?'
'Yes...' Steve says, and Karen emerges.
'You must be Steve's new girlfriend,' says Karen, shaking her hand.
'That's right,' says Ronnie, smiling, though she can't hide her ambiguity. 'Who're you?'
'Karen Phillips.'
'Ah right, so you're a frien-'
'I'm his ex wife.'
This silences Ronnie. She looks over at Steve, who looks despondent, before announcing she is going to go out. She grabs her coat and is gone within a minute.
'Right, then,' says one of the officers.
'Make yourself at home,' says Steve with a hint of sarcasm, and the officers do so. Karen does not sit.
'Where's Oscar?' she repeats.
'Hang on,' says Steve. 'You're lucky I've got baby stuff here 'cause of Amy, Karen!' he snaps, and heads into the bedroom. Moments later, he's back out holding the child. 'Here.'
Karen takes the baby and sits down. 'Come on Steve, make yourself at home,' she says.
Steve sits.
Over at the Peacock house, Claire is in the kitchen while Ashley sits with the baby. 'Ashley?' Claire starts.
'Yeah?'
'Are you still mad with me, about Matt?'
'I'm mad with him, Claire, not you... if he so much as tries to come near us ever again, I'll kill him...'
'He still wants to be a part of Josh's life...'
'If it wasn't for him, you wouldn't have been put at risk! He knocked you down Claire, that's why your waters broke! I wanted to be here when the baby was born - she was due in two weeks!'
'Well you weren't here were you?' Claire cries.
'No, I was with Maxine's mum... she wants to see her grandson every now and then, you know!'
'You've been ignoring me for weeks though,' Claire says. 'Ever since Matt came on the scene, things have been different...'
Ashley can understand what she's saying. 'I know... but -'
'No, Ashley, I want things to be how they were... we've got a new baby now, if you don't love me you can tell me now!'
'Of course I love you,' says Ashley, feeling tearful. 'Come here...'
Claire sits by his side and he puts his arm around her. 'Things are going to be okay. I'll deal with Matt, and I won't let him spoil our marriage again. It's going to be fine, Claire, it's all going to be fine...'
Claire is reassured by his words, but Ashley's expression is of determination. He means what he says - if Matt tries anything again, he doesn't know what he'll do, but he knows he might not be responsible for his actions...
At the Baldwin house, Jamie is waking. He opens his eyes and spots Danny sitting in the chair, looking despondent, grief-stricken. He can't find the words to say. Frankie returns to the room. Dan, they can fit in a funeral tomorrow, or is it too soon?'
Danny looks up and nods. 'No, tomorrow... it needs to be done...'
'And the will...' adds Frankie. 'His will is to be read on Tuesday... they need direct family present.'
'Okay, yeah,' says Danny, and on remembering how he conned his father while he was so easily manipulated brings a tear to his eye. Jamie stands up rather quickly. He can't forgive Danny for what he did to Mike, sending him to Spain, using him for the cash...
'Jamie,' Frankie breathes. 'I'll make you some breakfast...'
'I'm going to the cafe.'
He's gone before another word can be said.
'About this funeral,' Danny croaks. 'What do we need to do?'
'Don't worry, Dan, I'll fix it - I'm making calls... Mike's being transferred to the morgue today, I think you should go and see him. It's what's best.'
'Yes,' Danny breathes. 'I'll go now...' Then he remembers the others. 'What about Penny? Adam? The factory...?'
'Leave it to me Dan, just focus on yourself.'
The gratitude in Danny's eyes doesn't go unnoticed by Frankie, who smiles and starts dialling another number.
Todd is at the bus stop when Violet meets him. 'Hey,' she says.
'Hey,' he says, smiling.
'Where are you taking me?'
'You'll have to wait and see,' Todd replies enigmatically. 'You got any other plans for today?'
'No, I got a day off,' says Violet, before returning to the topic. 'Shouldn't I be wary about letting a mysterious man take me out for the day to an unknown place?'
She's smiling. So is he.
'Yes,' says Todd. 'You should be terrified. I'm out to get you!'
He laughs, and their bus arrives. The step onto the bus and pay, but they are being watched. For, standing in the entrance to the health centre, is Gail Platt.
'So this baby,' says one of the officers, 'is your baby?'
'Yes,' say Steve and Karen in unison.
'Then why did you call?'
'Um...'
'Wasting police time is a criminal offence, Mr McDonald.'
The officers are now standing. 'In future, please only call if your need is important - there are other people who need police help, people who aren't wasting valuable time.'
'We're very sorry,' says Karen, though her sincerity is debatable.
'Well, we'll say no more,' says the officer. 'We'll let ourselves out.'
Once the officers are gone, Karen stops Steve from leaving with them. 'We need to talk.'
Over at the Peacock house, all is well. 'I'm going to go to Fresco's and buy some things for the baby... we need to think of names... nappies... oh, my!' says Claire, climbing up.
Ashley's laughing. 'Names? I hadn't even thought...'
'Well have a think, I'll be back soon...'
Claire grabs her coat as Ashley offers to come with her. 'No, stay here with the baby, have some quality time with her.'
She smiles, and leaves, opening the door to reveal Matt Ramsden, who was just about to knock. Gasping, she pushes him out and slams the door before Ashley can see. 'Matt, you can't ever come back here!'
She's walking and Matt's walking backwards. 'Whoa, whoa, why?'
'Ashley - you really made him mad, he says he'll kill you if you come back again... he's so mad that you delivered our baby, he never wants to see you again... Please, stay away!'
'I can't abandon Josh, he's my son!'
'Stay away, Matt, go home, get away! I'm sorry... for your own sakes, stop. Ashley and I need to think about our baby, we can't be doing with stress...'
'But Josh is my kid.'
'He's not your kid, he never was! We raised him! Stay away! Get in your car and go home...'
Claire storms past him, hoping he'll get into his car, which he does. She breathes a relieved sigh and continues to Fresco's. Matt drives to the end of the Street and stops for a moment, looking back at the Peacock house. He wasn't going to give up on his son, no matter what Claire said. Regardless of Ashley's empty threats.
Inside, Gail is returning to her house to find Sarah. She can't believe Todd has the nerve to come back - after all this time... opening her door with her key, she calls up to her daughter.
Sarah and Jason are dressing upstairs. 'Yeah?' Sarah calls.
'Come down here, I've got something to tell you.'
'Jason!' Sarah says urgently. 'My mum can't know you're here... she's supposed to have gone to work!'
'I'll wait on the stairs,' says Jason.
'Sarah!' Gail calls again.
'Coming,' Sarah shouts back, and she's running down the stairs. 'What is it?'
'Want to know who I just saw on the Street?'
'Who?' says Sarah, though she already knows.
'Todd.'
'I know...'
'You know?'
'Last night, I called for Jason and he was there...'
'Well are you okay?'
'Yeah, I'm fine, it's just a shock... I want him to stay away from me. He's probably not stopping...'
'Let's hope not,' says Gail fretfully. 'I couldn't believe it when I saw him canoodling with Violet from the Rovers... I thought he was supposed to be gay?'
'Violet?' Sarah cries. 'He was with Violet?'
'Yes, and it looks like they are very much in to eachother. That boy is troubled, I'll tell you ... after everything he's put you through...!'
'Yeah,' says Sarah distantly, and she's so surprised she can barely speak.
And on the stairs, equally as surprised, but shocked and angry and upset moreso, Jason can't believe his ears.
10 Reviews:
Hi, it's Live82005, I've been missing the boards since I was unfairly banned, but I've still been viewing the boards.
Another fantastic installment, I'll add more later when I have more time.
Oh, David, I'm delighted you're still reading the boards and that you read the latest installment. Thanks a lot.
We all miss you on DS! Well, I do!
i check every day for this and the wait has been so long but u pulled it off, another AMAZING one!
keep it up xxxx
another great installment! keep going maxi.
.maxi - Just read this latest Corrie eppy of yours.....I just don't want to see him, mum :(......Great stuff once again; that made for a very good read. :)
See that you have gone for a different feel to this episode. No imagery this time, as you let the dialogue do almost all of the talking, so to speak! You let the emotions of the individuals take charge, rather than trying to create an atmosphere for the words, and I thought this worked well. The whole episode had a sort of 'getting on with things' feel, even though certain individuals...Toddddd :D...were getting on with things in an 'avoidance' kind of way, which wasn't entirely healthy.
The character I thought you wrote most successfully for, in this episode, was Ashley. I felt your depictions of his reactions, mannerisms and phrasing were quite accurate. I could, at one point, just imagine Ashley's face having that fixed look of 'determination', and his 'Come here' was spot-on!
As for Todd and Violet, and Todd's trying to avoid having to speak to Karl...well, you know how I want things to turn out... ;) ....Though, Todd saying he doesn't want to hurt Karl anymore proves to me just how much he cares about Karl - though will he ever show this to Karl..........maxiiiii!! :D :o
A minor point :o, but I think Todd would usually call his mother 'mam' and not 'mum'! :p :o
In terms of the grammar, there were a number of mistakes, and I did feel that some small sections of your wording didn't work too well.
For instance, with your non-dialogue lines, Eileen 'looking concerned in the lounge' was a strange turn of phrase! Then, Violet 'returning to the topic' felt, to me, like an unfinished line.
In terms of your lines of dialogue, things like Frankie saying, 'direct family' and the policeman saying, '....please only call if your need is important', didn't sound quite right.
However, these are more niggles than anything else, and they didn't spoil my enjoyment of the story. In fact, in general, your fic was very well written, yet again, and the standard you set with your previous work is being maintained - well done again! :D
I noticed that you employed some good old dramatic licence on a couple of occasions (the police turning up as Karen was at Steve's doorstep, and Matt arriving at the Ramsden's just as Claire was leaving), but you used these devices well, though be careful not to overdo this aspect of your storytelling.
So, great work again, .maxi. I'm interested to see where you are going with all of your various plot threads.....*cough* Todd 4 Karl...Karl 4 Todd..*cough* :D :o
And I'll end with my two favourite lines of the episode.
This first one I love as, simply, it made me smile! Also, this one is a little surprising coming from me, seeing as it forms part of Todd's banter with Violet, when you know who I'd prefer him to be having banter *cough* Karl *cough* with...lol!! :D For the context to the line, I'll also quote the preceding few lines.....
No, I got a day off,' says Violet, before returning to the topic. 'Shouldn't I be wary about letting a mysterious man take me out for the day to an unknown place?'
She's smiling. So is he.
'Yes,' says Todd. 'You should be terrified. I'm out to get you!'
And this is my second favourite line, particularly because of how in character it was for Sarah to say it......
'Violet?' Sarah cries. 'He was with Violet?'
xx Joanna xx
Fantastic again .maxi, this is one of the best pieces of fanfiction I have ever read! Your use of language is stunning, and you are very versatile as a writer. This is your future career, I know it!
Loving your work, and when is the next one up?
xxx
hey, i love your fic. it's so dramatic and well written, my favourite episode was the one where mike died/claire gave birth it was the most beautiful piece of writing. simply amazing. saying that the latest episode was still great as i love karen and steve, plus you are writing the baldwin reaction better than it has been shown on the TV... jamie's reaction is the same but frankie is acting more in character, perfect! i read your episodes before yesterday's and could draw the similarities, though and i'm not lying, i would have preferred yours on screen! you should definitely consider writing as a serious option for your later career. you would make a perfect corrie writer, you're a total natural! and don't go denying it, it's true! loving your work, btw, how many episodes will there be in the series? and will there be another series? well done anyway, and keep it up maxi! xxxxx <3
hey belle, thanks for the nice comment.
there will be twelve episodes, after which the series will end. not sure if i'll do another series, yet, we'll see. :)
Hi - Sally here.
Just congratulating you on your work, it's terribly impressive and I am gripped. Keep it up.
Brilliant episode .maxi, it was all very realistic and the characters were written well and true to form. The storylines are unfolding nicely and at a good pace. I'll look forward to reading more.
Post a Comment
<< Home